Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the ground each morning the devil says, "OH CRAP, SHE'S UP"!
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Monday, November 1, 2010
Mother Nature and Halloween
For Halloween I was Mother Nature, below are some of the pictures from that evening.
At the beginning of the night I had flowers and plants sprouting from my hair and on my face and feathers coming out of my eyes...then I happened. Apparently I decided it was going to be so windy that it would take off the feathers from my eyes. Oops!
What were you all for Halloween?
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| My Hair and all the crazy stuff growing in it |
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| Playing coy with someone else's costume |
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| Flowers sprout from everywhere |
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
A ballad written by me and JDP
Hipster Blues
Told too many war stories as a teenager
So I put on my vintage June Cleaver apron and got to thinking
About the things I could be making you
Got my PBR and vintage guitar
Turned on the Bakelite playing my favorite song
By that obscure band I heard in
Por-r-r-rtland
It ain't cool, if they know about it too
It ain't cool, if they know about it too
Don't know if you know about it
Don't know if you're cool enough
Cause I'm ready to leave you because
You ain't cool, if you didn't know about it too
You ain't cool, if you didn't know about it too
Yes my vision is 20/20, but that never stops me from wearing my
gran-an-an-dad's specs
I barely saw you when you walked into American Apparel
Buying your friend a gift card to her favorite store
In your J. Crew shirt and GAP jeans
I almost screamed, "your clothes are so clueless, do you know what I mean?!"
Instead I sneered my judgment with a disgusted look on my face
You looked at me as if I didn't exist, no emotion, not even a trace
I ain't cool, cause I didn't know about you
I ain't cool, cause I didn't know about you.
Monday, October 25, 2010
...a toast for all the scumbags, everyone one of them that i know
I'm sitting here on my red couch with the tv muted listening to Kanye's Runaway for the second time in a row. All the Taylor Swift fans gasp. I was never a Taylor Swift fan and when Kanye pulled his dickhead stunt I laughed and was ready to move on.
There was so much ado over what happened and people were all aghast over a known ahole doing what he does best, speak his unfiltered mind.
It had me thinking though, whether I'm too apathetic or the world is personalizing things too much. This is a change for me as I used to take things so personally, whether it was said or done to me or not. Now, I'm more of the ilk that I'll address what I feel needs speaking to and let everyone sort out their own business.
I doubt any of this maturity,"...and I know I've did damage cause the look in your eyes is killing me..."
There was so much ado over what happened and people were all aghast over a known ahole doing what he does best, speak his unfiltered mind.
It had me thinking though, whether I'm too apathetic or the world is personalizing things too much. This is a change for me as I used to take things so personally, whether it was said or done to me or not. Now, I'm more of the ilk that I'll address what I feel needs speaking to and let everyone sort out their own business.
I doubt any of this maturity,"...and I know I've did damage cause the look in your eyes is killing me..."
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Stink Bugs: A Love Story
My entire trip to D.C. was to go to McBossy's wedding in Pennsylvania on Saturday. I didn't expect to learn so much.
Thursday
Was my flight in to Dulles (did you know it's in Virginia? Yeah, I didn't.) and Special K came to pick me up. There was a trip to Whole Foods for foodstuff and general hanging out. I love low key events because they require so little of me.
Friday
KP came to D.C. to hang out with me (YAY!) We went downtown in hopes to go hang out at the Lincoln Memorial. (Did you know there are no close parking lots to the Lincoln Memorial? Yeah, me neither.) So we drove around the mall, went into VA by accident and then found a parking lot to troll around the area.
We went to the International Spy Museum and it was pretty awesome (despite what some hipster co-worker says). I learned a lot, of which I cannot tell you because my name is Jane Meyer and I'm a 13 year-old from Sweetwater, TN. I'm a student going to Dublin, Ireland on vacation for 7 days.
There was food, fro-yo, an inappropriate statue, and duck fighting. See the pictures below.
The best was spending the day with an old friend.
Saturday
Getting up early sucks, but that was the theme for most of this trip, thanks mostly in part to my shitty travel agent (Ms. F is so fired.) We drove to the salon for Special K to get her hair did and meet up with McBossy and the rest of the bridesmaids. I finally got a face to most of the names McBossy would talk about, most of them looked like I imagined.
Then off to PA to get this wedding started. I ended up hanging out with Special K's Sissy most of the wedding which was nice. I like people who are easy to talk to and doesn't make me think of what they're trying to say or whether they mean what they say.
In PA I meet this.
The Stink Bugs were everywhere, you can actually hear them before you see them and then there they are flying into your cleavage or hair or ear or any part of your body. These are not intelligent bugs, but they are true to their name, to do stink when they are scared or killed.
McBossy comes down the aisle and there's a Stink Bug inside one of the layers of her dress, however, you don't stop the wedding for a Stink Bug. During the ceremony Stink Bugs descended upon the wedding party and in particular boinked McBossy right in the middle of her forehead. Ahhh good times.
Good times. There were a few tears, speeches, dancing, good food, cake on the face, and Stink Bugs.
Thursday
Was my flight in to Dulles (did you know it's in Virginia? Yeah, I didn't.) and Special K came to pick me up. There was a trip to Whole Foods for foodstuff and general hanging out. I love low key events because they require so little of me.
Friday
KP came to D.C. to hang out with me (YAY!) We went downtown in hopes to go hang out at the Lincoln Memorial. (Did you know there are no close parking lots to the Lincoln Memorial? Yeah, me neither.) So we drove around the mall, went into VA by accident and then found a parking lot to troll around the area.
We went to the International Spy Museum and it was pretty awesome (despite what some hipster co-worker says). I learned a lot, of which I cannot tell you because my name is Jane Meyer and I'm a 13 year-old from Sweetwater, TN. I'm a student going to Dublin, Ireland on vacation for 7 days.
There was food, fro-yo, an inappropriate statue, and duck fighting. See the pictures below.
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| Why is there a naked man in the Boy Scouts statue? Why? |
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| So Hank and Justin fought over Britney. Hank chased Justin around and around the pool while Britney just swam around without a care in the world. The other couple just tried to not get in the middle. |
Saturday
Getting up early sucks, but that was the theme for most of this trip, thanks mostly in part to my shitty travel agent (Ms. F is so fired.) We drove to the salon for Special K to get her hair did and meet up with McBossy and the rest of the bridesmaids. I finally got a face to most of the names McBossy would talk about, most of them looked like I imagined.
Then off to PA to get this wedding started. I ended up hanging out with Special K's Sissy most of the wedding which was nice. I like people who are easy to talk to and doesn't make me think of what they're trying to say or whether they mean what they say.
In PA I meet this.
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| The Stink Bug |
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| As the woman said, "they don't eat much." Plus, I didn't want to swat the bugs during the ceremony, she was really into it. |
Good times. There were a few tears, speeches, dancing, good food, cake on the face, and Stink Bugs.
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| Stink Bugs, you can't stop a good time. |
Monday, October 11, 2010
Signs of the Apocalypse (or Rather I'm Tired)
You know you're tired when you just want to bitch slap in a real half ass way every person you see. Your grandmother (sweet, kind, loving, delicate, elderly grandma) could get a smack if she got in the way.
Here are the signs to help you all realize when I'm too tired to function:
apocalypse I mean, that I'm tired. Can I go to bed now?
Here are the signs to help you all realize when I'm too tired to function:
- Everything you say to me will be taken as an insult (yeah, eff you too).
- Puppies and kittens are NOT CUTE.
- I agree with mostly everything you say unless you're pissing me off and then I will randomly pick something to disagree with you and battle you to the death over how correct I am.
- Sleeping becomes the best thing to do everywhere. I can sleep on the train, in the rain, at my desk, during a burlesque...
- Silence is the only acceptable sound on the planet.
- I have zero nice/kind things to say about anyone.
- My eyes are open, but not really.
- You hear me snoring and my eyes are wide open.
- I've got a dazed look on my face and I'm drooling (check to make sure I didn't have a stroke either).
- I'm rubbing my eyes.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Help Me, Not Hate You So Much
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| From http://www.worldwidehippies.com/?p=1342 |
Everyone that knows me, knows I have a distaste for the hipster. After reading a couple of articles about what hipsters are and why it seems the world hates them I came to a conclusion. I can no longer hate on the hipster, hating the hipster places me one step closer to the thing I despise and that will not happen, not on my watch.
There is no clear cut definition of what a hipster is, some say a groupie of the latest trend (hence the name), others say people who long to go back to a simpler times (record players, Buddy Holly glasses, grandpa sweaters, listening to NPR on the radio and such), there are others still who say they are searching for their own niche while combining other genres (skinny jeans, v neck shirts, PBR drinking, layers of scarves, Bieber hair, steam punk items, antiques obtained from raiding grandpa's closet), yet all agree they hate things passionately and they always know where the "IT" place or are telling others where they should go to eat, drink, watch a play, etc. and in general display snobbery of things deemed uncool.
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| From http://41hebrewcat.wordpress.com/2010/06/20/hipsters-in-the-mist/ |
Another article called "Geeks Versus Hipsters" talks about the two groups and they wrapped up saying that hating hipsters is like reverting back to high school. Oooo burn! That stung. Yes, sometimes it takes someone (sometimes a stranger writing an article) for me to be enlightened.
However, there are times when those smug faces telling me where I should be eating, what I should be doing just makes me snap and I want to scream, "THAT OUTFIT LOOKS RIDICULOUS ON YOU AND YOU'RE NOT THAT INTERESTING!" It's like when vegans scold you for eating a hamburger by passive aggressively telling you how much fat and cholesterol is in it and what cattle farming is doing to the environment. Yeah, I get it, but I don't eat it every day so back off ahole. I digress.
There are so many articles about hating hipsters, but hating them just makes us sound like one and that is counterproductive. So I'm shelving my future book "Hipsters Are a Sign of the Apocalypse" and stepping down from my high horse of Hipster hating.
This does not excuse skinny pants, v neck shirts on men, Bieber haircuts OR wearing glasses that are non-prescription (that's just stupid). Cut me some slack, change takes time.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Curiouser and Curiouser
Today during my lunchtime break I was chowing down, reading Facebook posts when I stumbled upon Felicia Day's post about pictures from outer space. These pictures are quite fascinating and then my mind started churning and wham, bam thank you ma'am I'm thinking about the Rosetta Stone. After reading about it, I came to the conclusion, I want a stele. That's right.
I want a monument, but not a grand scale, maybe 4 feet tall, 16 inches in diameter. Something slate gray and smooth. What would I put on my stele? Great question. First it would be my bio, a carving of myself during a period when I looked the best (of course) and then some made up stories of grandeur. It's my stele, I'll lie if I want to. My stele will be less phallic than the one below and better done, of course.
What would you put on yours?
I want a monument, but not a grand scale, maybe 4 feet tall, 16 inches in diameter. Something slate gray and smooth. What would I put on my stele? Great question. First it would be my bio, a carving of myself during a period when I looked the best (of course) and then some made up stories of grandeur. It's my stele, I'll lie if I want to. My stele will be less phallic than the one below and better done, of course.
What would you put on yours?
Stele of Hammurabi
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Miss Manners Presents...How Not to Look Like an Ahole at Dinner
Here are what I feel a few suggestions that I think some people may have forgotten about.
Now I know people are going to go, "What?! (Who) these are not that bad. In fact I do them." To that I respond, "Yes they are and I know you do." It's kind of like the nose picker who turns their head thinking no one can see them doing it, we can. This is not assuming you are trying to purposely look like an asshole, we all have ticks. Mine is voicing my opinion constantly, I'm half-heartedly working on that.
Things That Make You Look Like an Asshole at Dinner:
Courtesy Factors
When you do the first three items you're basically telling the people you're with that their company is not either engaging enough for you, you are throwing them a bone even being in their presence, or they are just not that important. I'm going to tell you this now, your crap stinks cause your farts keep giving you away. You are not that important that you as a person can afford to lose friends and lose friends you will. It's only a matter of time before anyone of substance will no longer tolerate this kind of behavior and stop associating with you. Imagine if you will the shoes were reversed.
Plus, when you do these things it's being quite anti-social and why did you even agree to have a meal with anyone if that's what you're going to do? Save your money, time and energy and make a sandwich at home.
Don't Be Rude Factors
The fourth and fifth points just gross me out when people comb their hair where I'm eating and I don't gross out easily. I don't need your dandruff peppering my food. As for eating off my plate, this will practically get you an entire meal for free AND I will never eat with you again. Here's why, you made a decision about what you wanted to eat, so did I. Just because you chose poorly doesn't mean I should have to offer up my plate to you. This is not to say if I offer up my plate for you to sample or partake of that you cannot. This is either asking me for a "bite" or just plain ole grabbing food off my plate. Do me the courtesy of offering it to you if I feel inclined. Rude.
As for the last point about tipping, don't go to dinner if you can't afford to tip the people who are serving your food.
Just because I put dinner doesn't mean any meal doesn't apply.
This has been lovely, but I have work that requires my attention.
Now I know people are going to go, "What?! (Who) these are not that bad. In fact I do them." To that I respond, "Yes they are and I know you do." It's kind of like the nose picker who turns their head thinking no one can see them doing it, we can. This is not assuming you are trying to purposely look like an asshole, we all have ticks. Mine is voicing my opinion constantly, I'm half-heartedly working on that.
Things That Make You Look Like an Asshole at Dinner:
- Taking calls at the table
- Constantly looking at other people instead of engaging with the people you're dining with
- Playing with your mobile phone, whether this is text messaging or even playing a game
- Grooming yourself at the table, there's a bathroom, go use it
- Picking food off my plate while I'm eating from it
- Tipping poorly, don't look to see what someone else tipped if the bill is split, tip your 15 - 20% or more unless service was horrible
Courtesy Factors
When you do the first three items you're basically telling the people you're with that their company is not either engaging enough for you, you are throwing them a bone even being in their presence, or they are just not that important. I'm going to tell you this now, your crap stinks cause your farts keep giving you away. You are not that important that you as a person can afford to lose friends and lose friends you will. It's only a matter of time before anyone of substance will no longer tolerate this kind of behavior and stop associating with you. Imagine if you will the shoes were reversed.
Plus, when you do these things it's being quite anti-social and why did you even agree to have a meal with anyone if that's what you're going to do? Save your money, time and energy and make a sandwich at home.
Don't Be Rude Factors
The fourth and fifth points just gross me out when people comb their hair where I'm eating and I don't gross out easily. I don't need your dandruff peppering my food. As for eating off my plate, this will practically get you an entire meal for free AND I will never eat with you again. Here's why, you made a decision about what you wanted to eat, so did I. Just because you chose poorly doesn't mean I should have to offer up my plate to you. This is not to say if I offer up my plate for you to sample or partake of that you cannot. This is either asking me for a "bite" or just plain ole grabbing food off my plate. Do me the courtesy of offering it to you if I feel inclined. Rude.
As for the last point about tipping, don't go to dinner if you can't afford to tip the people who are serving your food.
Just because I put dinner doesn't mean any meal doesn't apply.
This has been lovely, but I have work that requires my attention.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Muse, Oh Sweet Muse...Where Did You Run Off To?
Over the past four years something happened, ok maybe a lot has happened over that time. I moved, started/finished grad school, lost/found jobs, made/lost friends, lost/gained weight (this one pisses me off), weddings, births and funerals. Life.
I fancied myself as a creator, I liked to make/write things. Even as a kid I would write stories, act them out with my Barbies and even built my own wagon to carry my stuff around the backyard in. As an adult I wrote still, nothing to be published, but because it was something I felt I needed to do. Whether it was poetry, short stories, or a badly written screenplay, I did it.
McBossy and I even created Rules to Friendship in our early to mid twenties when we felt that some of our friends needed a manual on how to be a decent friend. It's hilarious and one day I'll post it out. Then the Monthly Bitch came in newsletter format and eventually the blog. Letters to friends on both coasts, back and forth, keeping in touch with everyone.
Then suddenly it feels and as I look back it seems even it was like BAM! No more.
Maybe grad school sucked out all my creativity, maybe.
I used to get great ideas or ideas of stories I would write when I had the time. I had to carry around a notebook so I could scribble them down when they came to me. Now...nothing. If there's such thing as a muse, she's run off to be with someone else, tramp. If it's me, that's even scarier. How does one get inspiration again? If it's gone for a certain period of time does it ever return? What if I can never write anything longer than a tweet again? Is creativity like dreaming? I can't remember the last time I woke up remembering a dream. Is it just me?
I fancied myself as a creator, I liked to make/write things. Even as a kid I would write stories, act them out with my Barbies and even built my own wagon to carry my stuff around the backyard in. As an adult I wrote still, nothing to be published, but because it was something I felt I needed to do. Whether it was poetry, short stories, or a badly written screenplay, I did it.
McBossy and I even created Rules to Friendship in our early to mid twenties when we felt that some of our friends needed a manual on how to be a decent friend. It's hilarious and one day I'll post it out. Then the Monthly Bitch came in newsletter format and eventually the blog. Letters to friends on both coasts, back and forth, keeping in touch with everyone.
Then suddenly it feels and as I look back it seems even it was like BAM! No more.
Maybe grad school sucked out all my creativity, maybe.
I used to get great ideas or ideas of stories I would write when I had the time. I had to carry around a notebook so I could scribble them down when they came to me. Now...nothing. If there's such thing as a muse, she's run off to be with someone else, tramp. If it's me, that's even scarier. How does one get inspiration again? If it's gone for a certain period of time does it ever return? What if I can never write anything longer than a tweet again? Is creativity like dreaming? I can't remember the last time I woke up remembering a dream. Is it just me?
Thursday, July 8, 2010
My Emmy Predictions
Since I am so over who LeBron signs with and the Emmy noms have been released today I'm going to make my predictions. Look for the RED BOLD font as to who I think will win. Now, there are some that I blindly picked, like Drama...really? Drama? No. However, comedy...if I didn't pick Glee or a Glee cast member it's because another was WAY more deserving.
Drama Series
Breaking Bad
Dexter
The Good Wife
Lost
Mad Men
True Blood
Comedy Series
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Glee
Modern Family
Nurse Jackie
The Office
30 Rock
Lead Actor in a Drama
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Michael C. Hall, Dexter
Kyle Chandler, Friday Night Lights
Hugh Laurie, House
Matthew Fox, Lost
Jon Hamm, Mad Men
Lead Actress in a Drama
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer
Glenn Close, Damages
Connie Britton, Friday Night Lights
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Mariska Hargitay, Law and Order: SVU
January Jones, Mad Men
Supporting Actor in a Drama
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
Martin Short, Damages
Michael Emerson, Lost
Terry O'Quinn, Lost
John Slattery, Mad Men
Andre Braugher, Men of a Certain Age
Supporting Actress in a Drama
Sharon Gless, Burn Notice
Rose Byrne, Damages
Christine Baranski, The Good Wife
Archie Punjabi, The Good Wife
Christine Hendricks, Mad Men
Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men
Lead Actor in a Comedy
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
Larry David, Curb Your Enthusiasm
Matthew Morrison, Glee
Tony Shalhoub, Monk
Steve Carell, The Office
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Lead Actress in a Comedy
Lea Michele, Glee
Julia LouisDreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Toni Collette, United States of Tara
Supporting Actor in a Comedy
Chris Colfer, Glee
Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your Mother
Ty Burrell, Modern Family
Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Modern Family
Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family
Jon Cryer, Two and a Half Men
Supporting Actress in a Comedy
Jane Lynch, Glee
Julie Bowen, Modern Family
Sofia Vergara, Modern Family
Kristen Wiig, Saturday Night Live
Jane Krakowski, 30 Rock
Holland Taylor, Two and a Half Men
Drama Series
Breaking Bad
Dexter
The Good Wife
Lost
Mad Men
True Blood
Comedy Series
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Glee
Modern Family
Nurse Jackie
The Office
30 Rock
Lead Actor in a Drama
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Michael C. Hall, Dexter
Kyle Chandler, Friday Night Lights
Hugh Laurie, House
Matthew Fox, Lost
Jon Hamm, Mad Men
Lead Actress in a Drama
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer
Glenn Close, Damages
Connie Britton, Friday Night Lights
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Mariska Hargitay, Law and Order: SVU
January Jones, Mad Men
Supporting Actor in a Drama
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
Martin Short, Damages
Michael Emerson, Lost
Terry O'Quinn, Lost
John Slattery, Mad Men
Andre Braugher, Men of a Certain Age
Supporting Actress in a Drama
Sharon Gless, Burn Notice
Rose Byrne, Damages
Christine Baranski, The Good Wife
Archie Punjabi, The Good Wife
Christine Hendricks, Mad Men
Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men
Lead Actor in a Comedy
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
Larry David, Curb Your Enthusiasm
Matthew Morrison, Glee
Tony Shalhoub, Monk
Steve Carell, The Office
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Lead Actress in a Comedy
Lea Michele, Glee
Julia LouisDreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Toni Collette, United States of Tara
Supporting Actor in a Comedy
Chris Colfer, Glee
Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your Mother
Ty Burrell, Modern Family
Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Modern Family
Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family
Jon Cryer, Two and a Half Men
Supporting Actress in a Comedy
Jane Lynch, Glee
Julie Bowen, Modern Family
Sofia Vergara, Modern Family
Kristen Wiig, Saturday Night Live
Jane Krakowski, 30 Rock
Holland Taylor, Two and a Half Men
Friday, June 25, 2010
About Susan
Last night I went to Rogers Park (the most north east neighborhood in Chicago) to the BoHo Theatre to watch Saren in Ghosts. I get there early so I can get a seat that's not front row because it's awkward when you know someone on stage and they can read your every expression. Pass.
I sit down and this party of four sit in the row in front of me. Being a small theatre (six rows of five seats) we're going to be part of an intimate audience. The woman with brown hair (Brown) starts talking about Susan.
Susan moved to L.A., not for acting reasons I soon found out. Woman was sitting in between Brown and a man with a ponytail (PonyBoy) who at that point says, "she'll be back, they always come back." PonyBoy tells Brown that she owes him $2. Brown asks for what. PonyBoy soon reminds her of the bet they made about Susan's boyfriend. The bet was that he would not make it as a famous sports writer. Brown shakes her head. PonyBoy reiterates that he is in fact and will never be a famous sports writer now. Brown states, "well of course not he's dead."
Brown and PonyBoy tell the story of Susan's boyfriend's tragic demise to Woman. PonyBoy did not like Susan's choice in men and in fact was not entirely broken up over the fact that he was dead. He was afterall "terrible to her" and not a very good person. Brown reminds him he died of a heart attack while driving, it was heart disease that did him in, it was all very sad. PonyBoy perks up at hearing the words "heart attack". "It wasn't heart disease that killed him, it was the coke. They always say heart disease, but it's usually something else. Like when my father died of heart disease, it was actually suicide." Woman appears stunned, let's be honest so am I.
Brown continues that she went to see Susan after she moved to L.A. they started to make plans to meet up, but Susan just stopped returning the messages. She thinks maybe it was too soon and that seeing her would remind her of what she left behind. They all nod their head in agreement.
Woman says, "so he died of the car crash?" Brown, "no, he was dead before the car crashed, he had an enlarged heart." PonyBoy, "coke tends to make everything enlarged. It was the coke that killed him. So you owe me $2." Brown, "I paid for drinks, so I owe you nothing." PonyBoy, "true."
Susan's a real person, this conversation actually happened 10 minutes before the play started. I feel really bad for Susan and I hope she's doing well in L.A.
The play Ghosts was really great. I enjoyed it a lot and so did PonyBoy who said my roommate was, "really good and the best in the play."
I sit down and this party of four sit in the row in front of me. Being a small theatre (six rows of five seats) we're going to be part of an intimate audience. The woman with brown hair (Brown) starts talking about Susan.
Susan moved to L.A., not for acting reasons I soon found out. Woman was sitting in between Brown and a man with a ponytail (PonyBoy) who at that point says, "she'll be back, they always come back." PonyBoy tells Brown that she owes him $2. Brown asks for what. PonyBoy soon reminds her of the bet they made about Susan's boyfriend. The bet was that he would not make it as a famous sports writer. Brown shakes her head. PonyBoy reiterates that he is in fact and will never be a famous sports writer now. Brown states, "well of course not he's dead."
Brown and PonyBoy tell the story of Susan's boyfriend's tragic demise to Woman. PonyBoy did not like Susan's choice in men and in fact was not entirely broken up over the fact that he was dead. He was afterall "terrible to her" and not a very good person. Brown reminds him he died of a heart attack while driving, it was heart disease that did him in, it was all very sad. PonyBoy perks up at hearing the words "heart attack". "It wasn't heart disease that killed him, it was the coke. They always say heart disease, but it's usually something else. Like when my father died of heart disease, it was actually suicide." Woman appears stunned, let's be honest so am I.
Brown continues that she went to see Susan after she moved to L.A. they started to make plans to meet up, but Susan just stopped returning the messages. She thinks maybe it was too soon and that seeing her would remind her of what she left behind. They all nod their head in agreement.
Woman says, "so he died of the car crash?" Brown, "no, he was dead before the car crashed, he had an enlarged heart." PonyBoy, "coke tends to make everything enlarged. It was the coke that killed him. So you owe me $2." Brown, "I paid for drinks, so I owe you nothing." PonyBoy, "true."
Susan's a real person, this conversation actually happened 10 minutes before the play started. I feel really bad for Susan and I hope she's doing well in L.A.
The play Ghosts was really great. I enjoyed it a lot and so did PonyBoy who said my roommate was, "really good and the best in the play."
...and We're Back! (The Good, The Bad and the Ugly)
It was suggested I wait a few days or even a week before posting this, but when have I been known to listen to suggestions? I wrote this on Monday, but being the slacker that I am I finally found the right pictures (two are not mine, you can determine which one it is).
I am back from NYC after three whirlwind days of traipsing around Midtown, Central Park and Murray Hill. Borrowing a format from my friend MommysStillFab I decided to bypass my normal diatribes and go with this.
The Good
- Seeing Central Park by foot and rickshaw
- Viewing Lower Manhattan 86 floors up in the Empire State Building
- Midtown, in all it's touristia-chic it's a lovely place
- Radio City Music Hall, the place has got to be one of the best places to ever see a concert in
- I'm pretty sure I sat where a Broadway star sat during the Tony's the week before
- My last boy band concert for a long while
- How quickly taxi drivers got to places
- No Sales Tax on clothing, what?!
- Starbucks on every corner
- Seeing a college friend I hadn't seen in over a decade
- Red Mango frozen yogurt. YUM! YUM! YUM!
- Being able to stay in an apt for free instead of paying a lot of money for a hotel room
The Bad
- Trash on the street at night
- The potential to run into rats with balls, ew!
- Not being able to get a taxi easily
- Lack of cleanliness in the subways
- Little sleep
The Ugly
- Patty with little sleep after three days
- and I'll leave it at that.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Big lights will inspire you, let's hear it for New York
Going to NYC in three days with a sprained foot. Walking down steps and talking at the same time, fail. Will that stop me? Hell no! Will I utilize the douchey Segway? Hell no! Will I be slow? Oh yes. I can envision grandma and her walker passing me by.
I believe the five of us that are going may have different agendas for NYC (minus our concert attending nights), but that's a-ok! Having properly googled and asked around I've compiled a list of things/places I want to visit. Stoked is a word that keeps popping into my mind when I think about these things.
My list of places to see while I'm in NYC:
I believe the five of us that are going may have different agendas for NYC (minus our concert attending nights), but that's a-ok! Having properly googled and asked around I've compiled a list of things/places I want to visit. Stoked is a word that keeps popping into my mind when I think about these things.
My list of places to see while I'm in NYC:
- Gray's Papaya
- Grammercy Park
- Empire State Building
- Museum of Sex
- Radio City Music Hall
- Central Park - Alice in Wonderland statue
- Central Park - Balcony Bridge
- Central Park - Belvedere Castle
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Why Can't I Quit You?
I've reached a new low tonight, when I rushed my dad (I was informed by my mother I haven't talked to him in 2 weeks and he's lonely -- via text she sent this) off the phone so I could get to my...
Bejeweled Blitz.
I hear you judging me, shut your mouth. You're jealous because you cannot score the top scores I now have learned to wield against my opponents. Yes, those opponents are my friends, but there are no friends in war. (I just had to take a break and go blitz some more, all this talk makes me want to do it more.) As I was blitzing I realized that I rushed my poor old pops off the phone to play because I cannot properly blitz and talk at the same time. This is also why I turned FB chat off, I can't have people trying to talk to me during a game! As if.
Have any of you seen Bejeweled Blitz Anonymous groups on Facebook? I think I need help or someone to show me how to score 500,000...whichever.
Bejeweled Blitz.
I hear you judging me, shut your mouth. You're jealous because you cannot score the top scores I now have learned to wield against my opponents. Yes, those opponents are my friends, but there are no friends in war. (I just had to take a break and go blitz some more, all this talk makes me want to do it more.) As I was blitzing I realized that I rushed my poor old pops off the phone to play because I cannot properly blitz and talk at the same time. This is also why I turned FB chat off, I can't have people trying to talk to me during a game! As if.
Have any of you seen Bejeweled Blitz Anonymous groups on Facebook? I think I need help or someone to show me how to score 500,000...whichever.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Burden of Proof
Over the weekend my friend and I got into a heated discussion about what neighborhood she worked in. I told her she worked in Lincoln Park. She decided to argue with me and say it was Lakeview.
At this I laughed, it was cute, she was trying to tell me I was wrong. I know the area, I know exactly where she works and she works no where near Lakeview. She even tried to tell me there were signs around the area stating Lakeview. I laughed again and said to her, "I know I'm right and you're continuing to argue with me about it. At this point the burden of proof lies with you. I don't need convincing, I know I'm right."
Well I forgot about it and the next day she tells me, "you were right." I forgot what I was right about, because well...my mind hasn't gotten capacity for things unless someone refreshes me. "Of course I was, about what?" "I work in Lincoln Park." "Yes, I know this." Then it dawns on me the argument we had the day before. She proceeds to tell me that the signs she remembers seeing were on the way to work and not exactly around where she works.
Here's why I knew I was right, I've been shopping in that area for years and loved that section of the Lincoln Park neighborhood known as Sheffield Gardens. No one messes with me and shopping, I can always get to the mothership. Recognize.
Moral of the story, arguing with me is pointless. Either I think I'm right, most times when I'm that adamant I am and I will put the burden of proof on you. Or, I'll forget and won't care what the argument is about and you bringing it up is childish, the argument is over. So I win either way.
At this I laughed, it was cute, she was trying to tell me I was wrong. I know the area, I know exactly where she works and she works no where near Lakeview. She even tried to tell me there were signs around the area stating Lakeview. I laughed again and said to her, "I know I'm right and you're continuing to argue with me about it. At this point the burden of proof lies with you. I don't need convincing, I know I'm right."
Well I forgot about it and the next day she tells me, "you were right." I forgot what I was right about, because well...my mind hasn't gotten capacity for things unless someone refreshes me. "Of course I was, about what?" "I work in Lincoln Park." "Yes, I know this." Then it dawns on me the argument we had the day before. She proceeds to tell me that the signs she remembers seeing were on the way to work and not exactly around where she works.
Here's why I knew I was right, I've been shopping in that area for years and loved that section of the Lincoln Park neighborhood known as Sheffield Gardens. No one messes with me and shopping, I can always get to the mothership. Recognize.
Moral of the story, arguing with me is pointless. Either I think I'm right, most times when I'm that adamant I am and I will put the burden of proof on you. Or, I'll forget and won't care what the argument is about and you bringing it up is childish, the argument is over. So I win either way.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
"You've been hit by a...
harasser. I was just bombarded by a harasser. I am usually the harasser. How did this happen? When did I let my guard down? Damnit!
The harassment was called for, not going to lie. I've been pretty cranks lately and it's quite possible it stems from my weight. Though I think the part when I quit smoking, been sick for 4 weeks straight (I've haven't been able to breathe without snot oozing from my nose for 4 weeks), found out my scale is 20 lbs. off and not in my favor, and my deadline to find a new job is approaching. So forgive me if I'm a little cranky and can't deal with any additional bullshit. I have some stuff going on in my head that only food seems to cure.
I get it though. Not healthy. If coke was around, I might be able to switch to something else, but damnit food rocks. So in order to stop the harassment, because it won't stop ever. This bitch has a frakkin' black belt in harassment, she probably even has a dojo where she's teaching others how to harass people into submission. If only they would use their powers for good.
So good-bye fries of love, good-bye Hostess treats of delight, good-bye cheesey treasures of goodness, good-bye hot doggy lovelies we had a fun run these last 3 years. I'll miss you. Remember the good times we had as I masticated you repeatedly before swallowing.
Does this mean I have to give up my lattes too? Fuck.
The harassment was called for, not going to lie. I've been pretty cranks lately and it's quite possible it stems from my weight. Though I think the part when I quit smoking, been sick for 4 weeks straight (I've haven't been able to breathe without snot oozing from my nose for 4 weeks), found out my scale is 20 lbs. off and not in my favor, and my deadline to find a new job is approaching. So forgive me if I'm a little cranky and can't deal with any additional bullshit. I have some stuff going on in my head that only food seems to cure.
I get it though. Not healthy. If coke was around, I might be able to switch to something else, but damnit food rocks. So in order to stop the harassment, because it won't stop ever. This bitch has a frakkin' black belt in harassment, she probably even has a dojo where she's teaching others how to harass people into submission. If only they would use their powers for good.
So good-bye fries of love, good-bye Hostess treats of delight, good-bye cheesey treasures of goodness, good-bye hot doggy lovelies we had a fun run these last 3 years. I'll miss you. Remember the good times we had as I masticated you repeatedly before swallowing.
Does this mean I have to give up my lattes too? Fuck.
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